RANDOM SHT, NARUTO AND DRUGS
by CSHUMER
Summary: For Naruto he's loved by all women except old people, sasuke's gay and a man rapist, and sakura is still useless.
1. Yay my first fanfic Chapter lol

Random Sht THE WONDERFUL MIX OF NARUTO AND DRUGS... WONDERFUL DRUGS!

DISCLAIMER:

I DO NOT OWN NARUTO, OR ANY SONGS I USE BUT I SURE DO OWN THE DRUGS!!!!!!!!!

CSHUMER: HEY ABE

lord of the high seas: HEY CODY DID YOU TAKE MY CRACK WHEN I WASN'T LOOKING???

CSHUMER: UMM... NO, SHUT UP!

lord of the high seas: HEY SHOULDN'T U DO THE DISCLAIMER?

CSHUMER: ALREADY DID, ARE YOU BLIND?

lord of the high seas: NO, BUT YOUR MOM IS.

CSHUMER: 'SNIFF' THAT HURTS... ANYWAY ON TO THE FANFIC!!!!!!!

IN THE VILLAGE HIDDEN IN THE POT LEAVES. NARUTO WAS RUNNING TO FOR HIS NON-GAY VIRGINITY. BECAUSE SASUKE THE GAY EMO

(SASUKE'S FANS PLZ DON'T KILL ME FOR THIS BUT I DON'T LIKE HIM HE'S ANNOYING) WAS TRYING TO GRAB HIS MANHOOD AND RAPE HIM.

TRUST ME HE'S NOW WORSE THAN SAKURA, AND SHE'S A USELESS LUMP.

NARUTO: AH, FINALLY GOT AWAY FROM HIM, THANK GOD FOR METAL PIPES TO BEAT PEOPLE WITH. NOW TIME FOR THE THREESOME WITH HINATA AND ANKO.

ALL THE GIRLS IN THE VILLAGE: NOW WHEN NARUTO COMES OUT WE WILL HAVE HIS BABIES OK? (ALL) OK!!!!!

NARUTO: OH GOD NOT MY DAILY WORKOUT AGAIN... OH WELL HERE IT GOES.

WEIRD VOICE: YOUR THE BIGGEST BAKA EVER!

NARUTO: WHO ARE YOU?

WEIRD VOICE: I'M YOUR COMMON SENSE!

NAUTRO: REALLY?

COMMON SENSE: NO I'M YOUR DOCTOR WHO'S GONNA GIVE YOU AN ANAL EXAM, OF COURSE I AM!!!!!

NARUTO: NOOOOO!!! I HATE PROSTATE EXAMS!!!!! HELP!!!!!

COMMON SENSE: YOUR AN IDIOT. I DON'T KNOW WHY ALL THE GIRLS LIKE YOU!

NARUTO: CUZ THIS IS WHY I'M HOT. I'M HOT CUZ I'M FLY, YOU AIN'T CUZ U NOT. THIS IS WHY, THIS IS WHY, THIS IS WHY I'M HOT!

COMMON SENSE: UHH! WELL I MIGHT AS WELL TELL YOU. GO TO THE ROOF AND JUMP FROM ROOFTOP TO ROOFTOP SO U DON'T GET

ATTACKED.

NARUTO: OK!


	2. Revenge of sasuke and fans

**Chapter 2: W.T.F. all the girls love Naruto?!?!?!?!?**

**(Poor Naruto for what happens!)**

**CSHUMER: **HEY ABE!

lord of the high seas: HEY CODY! YOU DO KNOW THAT ALL THE SASUKE FANS ARE AFTER YOU.

ANGRY MOB OF SASUKE FANS: _**WHO WROTE THIS FANFIC?!?!?!?!?!?!?!**_

**CSHUMER**: HE DID (POINTING AT lord of the high seas)

lord of the high seas: Wait no I didn't. _**WHAT ARE YOU ALL DOING?!?!? (Gun shots) 'Thump!'**_

**CSHUMER**: Umm...(Note to self never anger Sasuke fans again)... anyway on to the disclaimer!

lord of the high seas(barely alive) and sasuke fans: **Disclaimer**: **CSHUMER **does not own naruto in any way. But he still owns the drugs!!!!!!!!

Naruto: OK!

Then Naruto and his genius self(said sarcastically) jumps right into the crowd of girls. Who will all do stuff to him I cannot say because then my fanfic will be rated M.

Crowd of girls: Hey look it's Naruto, Get HIM!

Naruto: Ah F---!

Sasuke: HEY! Get away from him(pulls out kunai and shuriken, ready to attack) or I'll go Chuck Norris on your $$es.

Crowd of girls: Oh yeah?!?!?(They all pull out guns)

Sasuke: (Well time for plan B) 'pulls out an rpg and a tank comes behide him' Say hello to my little friend( Author note: I do not own Tony Montana's catchfrase, if you don't know what I mean then go watch Scarface D)

Crowd of girls: RUN!!!(they all run for dear life)

Naruto: Uhh, Wait a minute, Dam they stole my Cocaine! Anyway thanks for the save Sasuke...

Sasuke: Oh it was nothing but come here I have to show you something.

Naruto: OK! (5 minutes later...) So... Sasuke what are we doing in this warehouse? Sasuke? Why are you padlocking the door? Sasuke why are you pulling down your pants?!?!? NOOO!!!! DON'T PULL MY PANTS DOWN! THATS NOT SUPPOSED TO GO IN THERE! SASUKE? SASUKE? NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

MEANWHILE

Back at Anko's place

Anko: Hey Hinata?

Hinata: Yeah?

Anko: Do you have a feeling that Naruto's being raped by Sasuke again?

Hinata: Yes, do you?

Anko: Yeah we have to go save him I know where he is! 

Hinata: Where do you think he's at?

Anko: The Warehouse! Now lets go!

BACK AT THE WAREHOUSE...

Naruto: Why are you shoving pot up my butt and smoking it!

Sasuke: You still don't get it. I'm gay and I love you!

Naruto: OH MY GOD! Don't you know I'm straight! (Well there was that time...)

Sasuke: What you don't have the same feeling about me that I have about you?

Naruto: Nope!

Sasuke:... Then you must die after I finish having my fun with you!

Anko: Not so fast Michael Jackson!

Sasuke: He's my dad you know!

Anko: What the F---?!?!?!?!? Thats weirder than the time Peter Griffen beat up the chicken! (A/N: if you haven't seen it go on youtube, and look up Peter vs. the Chicken P)

Sasuke: So what at least I don't have girly parts!

Anko: Well, thats why Naruto doesn't like you the way you do cuz your a Homo who loves Tickle Me Emo(A/N it's on madtv. Look up on youtube for tickle me emo! XP)

Sasuke: 'Sniff' So what if i'm a gay emo.

CSHUMER: OK EVERYONE STOP! I'm getting really mad at this Chapter so either you let me end it the easy way, or... the hard way(pulls out a gun).

Everyone: WE'LL TAKE THE EASY WAY!!!

CSHUMER: Yeah, you all better. Ok readers the next chapter will not even continue where this one left off! Sorry but I did most of this when I was tired, stoned or both. So sorry!


End file.
